When your life turns upside down, how can you heal faster?

When your life turns upside down, how can you heal faster?

“Only one person in this world can ever make you feel depressed, worried, or angry
                                                      and that person is YOU!”
                                                                                                                      Dr. David D Burns.

All of us no matter blessed we are, we may sometime experience loss of loved one, a separation,  a frightening illness, financial insecurity , job loss, highly stressful situation or failure in life.  If we master how our mind works, we may be able to find a better and faster solution to reach normalcy.

It bends in stormy winds, but it won't break. Will be back to normal soon.

How we cope with the crisis depends on how we emerge with greater confidence and wisdom , when we are depressed, or ill or overwhelmed. Imagine a tree on a mountain, stricken by stormy winds, it bends, but does not break. Its strong roots keep it firm to ground. After the storm it returns to its prior state and continues to flourish.  Like the tree we have to cultivate emotional flexibility to withstand any crisis.

First of all accept your feelings.  Accept experience and express your feelings in a positive way. Don’t try to suppress it.  Being angry, hatred, worried is all counter-productive and drains your energy.
Find the reason? Is there  something you can do?  Take actions.

Don’t blame anyone. Forgive yourself as well as others. Don't belittle anyone. All people in this world are blessed  and talented in one way or other. Compete with our own excellance.  Take decisions and move forward. Don’t be dormant.

Get support from others

Get support from others. Find your own family, friends, or society. Accept help from them. Be open- minded. Share with others. Consult a clinical psychologist if required.



Add fun to your life ( This is Grenada)

Try to find meaning in life. Reorder your priorities. Think about what you would do to get out of it. Turn to Music or other time-pass. Get a massage. Get away from technology and sit quietly. Laugh out loud. Laughter is one of the most effortless and inexpensive ways to de-stressing yourself and dissolving the little knots of tension that can give rise to unhealthy medical conditions. Get a pet. Do something you like, some social activities and voluntary jobs to others. Be organized; take charge of your time. Think positive, be content, and loving. Make use of your time. Add fun to life. Get yourself engaged. Get away from negative people. These will only worsen your situation. You require courage to face the life. Disengage from toxic worry. Get out of your chair or bed. Walk around. Talk to a friend. Observe your natural surroundings. Do not settle into worry. The longer you let worry lasts, the harder it becomes to escape it. Do some gardening, or cooking. Mix with people who are relaxed and positive. Try to find time for yourself. Be ready to change. Don’t be stubborn. Be broad-minded and open-minded. Create powerful positive word affirmations. Use soothing motivating words in relations. Make relaxation a way of life. Don’t drag, be a finisher.

 The anti-stress diet

Fast releasing sugar create stress in the body, stimulates the release of cortisol. Avoid eating them. Slow-releasing carbohydrates provide an ‘even keel’ of consistent energy. Take low glycemic index (GI) foods. In general these are fruits, whole grains, beans, lentils, nuts, seeds etc. If you are stressed out eat fruit, with some nuts, or brown rice with fish: sardine, herring, salmon which are the best.

Foods with low GI (<60)

Try to include more of the following foods that will raise the blood sugar slowly in your diet. They are oats, brown rice, lentils, barley, soybeans, peas, beans, carrots, apples, cherries, dates, figs, grapefruit, peaches, plums, butterbeans, baked beans, chickpeas, haricot beans, milk (whole and skimmed),  yogurt (plain and fruit) ice cream.

Get away from alcohol or drugs. These will worsen the situation only.

 Believe that you can bounce back to normalcy. Get moving. Step out of your comfort zone. Clear the weeds from your mind. Take actions. Make a strategy. Work out a plan. Execute it. This is not the end of the world. This is a step where you  may take a pause to the next jump of your life.
 

Look at this resume. All failures are taken as steps in the dream-conversion process.

At nine,   his mother died.
At twenty-one, he saw his first business fail.
At twenty-three, he ran for a state political office and lost.
At twenty-four, he saw his second business fail.
At twenty-seven, he had a nervous breakdown.
At twenty- nine, he ran for Congress and lost.
At thirty-one, he ran for Congress again, and lost again.
At thirty-seven, he ran for Congress and won. (At last !)
At forty-six, he ran for vice president and lost.
At forty-nine, he ran for the Senate and lost.
 A man with a series of failures, but if you dig further you can see a man of patience, persistence, and hard-work. He was a great person ready to face series of failures with a dream to become President of United States of America.  This man is Abraham Lincoln.  His story is a story from a log cabin to the White house. At the age of fifty-one, he became the 16^th president of United States of America.


Wilma Rudolph

Wilma Rudolph was born in a poor family, 20^th among 22 children. When she was four years old she became paralyzed by pneumonia and polio. But her mother encouraged her that with the God given ability, faith and persistence she could become anything she wanted.  At the age of eight she could walk with a leg brace. 

“At the age of 15 she joined Tennessee State University and met Coach Ed temple. She told him “I want to be the fastest woman on the tracks on this earth” Temple said “ With your spirit nobody can stop you and besides I will help you”

 

Wilma’s belief, confidence, hard-work, continuous practice, made her to win three Olympic prizes in 1960. She created history that paralytic women became the fastest on this earth.

This tells us despite problems in life with strong belief you can win in life.

Wilma thought God had a greater purpose for her than to win three gold medals. She started the Wilma Rudolph Foundation to help children learn about discipline and hard work.
The story of Heller Keller too is motivational  when life turns upside down.

Thomas lived on the hilly area of  Neyyar Dam in Trivandrum. He invited his relatives to participate on his son's marriage. The night before marriage, when the whole family and visitors were in deep sleep  heavy monsoon-rain, landside and muddy soil buried his whole house. Sixteen of his relatives were died and buried alive under the debris and mud .Only Thomas survived.  Though Thomas lost every one, he came back to his normal life after some time. With will power we can come to our normal life.




Connect with God, whatever religion you belong to.

Connect with the God. Find a spiritual solution in the nature. Meditate. Meditate to get power to relax from stress and build confidence and strength to face the situation. Meditation disciplines mind and strengthen it with courage. Generate a sense of calmness. Practice it every day either in the morning or in the evening or at your breaks. Take a short break, close your eyes, do deep breathing or simple prayer that help you to uplift. It will re-energize your brain during a hectic day. Join a prayer group or any group which will energize you.

When your life turns upside down or when you reach the cliff of your life, hold on to God. God has a plan, either to teach you how to fly or to catch you when you fall. Trust in God. Be calm.

Practice these techniques. You can heal faster. You can recover from the crisis faster. You hold the key for your happiness and sorrows. You are born for a purpose. You are born to live happily. You are your own master. God helps those who help themselves.